What to Change?
If you have already given this some thought inspired by the previous posts, then jump right into the part below on Golden Behaviors.
Either way, it is excellent to Begin with the End in Mind (thank you, Stephen Covey)…
What outcome are you hoping to bring into your life?
Is this outcome for yourself, something you want to do with another person, your whole family, or for some greater good?
Start with a Question!
What can you do as an individual or family?
Here are four questions to help you on your path to Radical Wellness.
- Write down the factors that you think make up a healthy life.
- Whatever they are, list them here:
- Write down what wellness means to you?
- Does it mean playing with your kids, grandkids, hanging out with friends?
- Does it mean having the freedom to move and the energy to do what you most enjoy?
- Whatever it is, write it down here:
- Write down three things that you are looking forward to and three reasons why you want to be well?
- Who am I, who do I get to be when I am moving towards this vision of wellness? It helps many people if they give this identity a playful name.
Examples:
1. Health Factors
- More Plants in our diet
- More Movement, even something simple
- Better Sleep or more time in deep sleep
- More Playfulness, enjoying each other in a way that is fun for all of us
- More time relaxing in a meaningful way together
2. What Does Wellness Mean to Me?
- Wellness is having enough energy to play with my kids after work.
- Wellness is not getting angry when others disagree with me.
- Wellness is being comfortable moving in my body.
3. Why?
- This is important to me because I want my kids to know who I really am.
- I want to hear other people’s ideas.
- I want to go on hikes and not be in pain.
4. Identity?
- Energetic Me, Super Me, Play Master, Daddyocool, or Mommyocool …
- Calm Me, stability master, diplomatic me …
- Comfortable Me, Strong and Radiant God/Goddess me, The Mountain Master…
These playful name can come in handy when claiming your identity, use your imagination, Super Me, Radiant Me, etc. If it makes you smile and feel a little shy about sharing it, that’s an excellent place to start.
Now go back up to the top and fill in your answers.
Today we will turn your answers into behaviors.
In the next Two Posts, We will turn them into habits.
How to Change?
Habits are Changing a Behavior – adding or deleting a specific behavior.
We start with identity and outcomes as they give us a compelling answer to the question, “Why Bother?”
Now we are asking the question. “what action should I/we start with?” This is potentially one of the most straightforward or most complicated questions to answer. If an idea pop’s in like, “take a walk after dinner!” that is great, start there. If not, then try this next exercise to help you come up with an action.
Golden Behavior
This exercise comes from Dr. Fogg’s excellent book, Tiny Habits. My recommendation is that you do this efficiently. It should take you about 10 minutes.
I like it because it is simple and effective.
1. Quickly brainstorm 15-20 Actions that move you towards your identity/outcome.
2. Put a Star by the ones that would be most effective at moving you towards your outcome.
3. Put a circle around the ones that you can see yourself doing.
Anything with both a circle and a star is a Golden Behavior.
Now I am going to ask you to list 15-20 things that you could stop to move you towards your identity or outcome and repeat the above process.
Golden Behaviors Lists:
Starts:
Stops:
List your golden behaviors here, and we will move to the next part in the next post.
A note for the perfectionist in us all: This is a process that you will learn and repeat and modify, just keep moving and don’t get stuck. You can always come back later and refine it. In fact, I recommend refining your plan every two to three months.
To say it once again, in any of these exercises, keep moving and put down your best quick response. Know you are learning the most crucial part, the process of how to install or delete behaviors.
To Your Health,
Dr. Ben
PS I have really enjoyed your comments and questions, keep them coming!
PSS Be well in this unprecedented time of COVID! Let me know if you are wanting a post about health tips for your immune system during COVID.
Next Post: How to Start a New Habit: Keep It Simple, Make It Fun, Bake It In, Forever.
Next Next Post: How to Stop a Habit: Make it Hidden, Make it Hard, Make It Hurt, Burn it Up, Forever.
Remember: When we make our actions so small that we do them daily, we build momentum, momentum builds habits!
